


grief stages

by maraudersourwolf



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Best Friends, Epic Bromance, Epic Friendship, F/M, Female Friendship, Friendship, Marauders' Era, Marlene is an Awesome Friend, Mutual Pining, Not Actually Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-11
Updated: 2018-01-11
Packaged: 2019-03-03 14:12:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13342908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maraudersourwolf/pseuds/maraudersourwolf
Summary: “So I heard you and Potter quite get along these days”Lily tilted her head to a side and looked blankly at Marlene, who was biting the nail from her right thumb like it treathened her well-being. There was a glint of someting mischevous on her brown eyes that brought back memories of how Sirius got bald for a week and how Slughorn got his nerves so worked up that dismissed her from detention hours earlier.





	grief stages

**Author's Note:**

> For the prompt: “His ego is so visible, I can almost watch it grow.”
> 
> It’s messy as fuck. And unbeta’d.   
> So there are probably way too many word written wrong and grammar mistakes.   
> But hey, I wrote again!
> 
> The thing with writer’s block and procastination is that you never know when it’s going to explode in your face.   
> And it did.   
> Explode, I mean.   
> But I’m stronger and I prevailed against the dark monster that ate my words away.
> 
> This is for Seda's birthday.  
> My dear, this is my gift to you. I know, your day is long gone but I tried.   
> I hope you like it and that you had an awesome birthday, because you pretty much deserve it.

 

“So I heard you and Potter quite get along these days”

Lily tilted her head to a side and looked blankly at Marlene, who was biting the nail from her right thumb like it treathened her well-being. There was a glint of someting mischevous on her brown eyes that brought back memories of how Sirius got bald for a week and how Slughorn got his nerves so worked up that dismissed her from detention hours earlier. A shiver went down her spine. Marlene smirked knowing what she was doing to her, the bitch.

“I hope you also heard that we have to get along, since we do patrols together”

“I’m not buyin that Lils and you know it,” yes, she knew it. But it was worth the try. “You can be amicable, work pals, patrol bros, respect each other as much as mentally wise possible. But you,” a finger with cracked blue nail polish pointed at her sharply, “and whatever is you’re doing with him,” the same sharp finger pointed accusatory towards the other side of the library, where Potter was looking at the two of them like an over-excited puppy drunk in felix felicis. The biggest smile Lily have ever seen on his lips. What a weirdo. She mentally scolded herself, she shouldn’t find that adorable, “is not just for the sake of being a good and proper headgirl.”

The silence stretched between the two of them. 

Lily wanted to object and tell her she was deadly wrong but knew better than that. Marlene was by her side since day one year one, when she told Lily that her red hair was ugly and Lily trew the book she was reading at her head. It was their trademark: they were painfully honest. And the thing was that even if in this exact moment it felt hideous, Lily loved that about them.

She looked back at Marlene, who was twisting a red lock of hair between her fingers smudged with ink.

“And what do you suggest I do?”

“Lils, I think we agreed to never ask my advice about anything in life,” Marlene smirked and let go of her hair, looking down at the book in front of her. It was in the same page as 20 minutes ago and wasn’t going to change anytime soon. “You’re the one with the brains, I’m the one with the mouth, remember?”

“Stop it,” Lily scrunched her face in disgust. “That sound more obsene each time you say it.”

“ _Where is the lie_ ,” Marlene sing-songed while starting to flip pages without really looking at them. 

Lily snorted and looked back at Potter, who was socking Sirius in the arm while the latter was laughing his ass off. As usual. She bite the inside of her cheek trying to stop her face from breaking into a smile that wasn’t welcome. She was miserably failing. Stupid Potter.

“ _Scandalous_ , miss Evans,” Marlene fake gasped at her side, giving her an excuse to smile for something else than how stupidly adorable the contrast between blush and black rimmed glasses were on Potter’s face. “The model student falling for the bad boy. Sounds like one of those muggle books you read at night,” those books were Tuni’s but for Marlene that wasn’t even the point.

“He’s not a bad boy anymore,” the words slipped so easily from her mouth that she wasn’t even sure it was her the one who talked. “He changed.”

“Debatable,” Marlene bumped shoulders with her, letting her head fall into Lily’s shoulder. “You should go for it instead of daydreaming,” she could feel those brown eyes burning into her soul, “Daydreaming is my thing, not yours.”

Lily rolled her eyes and let her head fall over Marlene’s. “I keep asking myself why we are friends”

“No, you don’t,” she was right. She didn’t. Marlene was probably one of the best decisions she ever took in her life. 

“His ego is so visible, I can almost watch it grow,” and wasn’t that a cheap attempt to shut the conversation down in her favor.

“And you got some serious issues since you find it endearing,” Lily gaped, trying to come up with something to say. No. There was nothing. Bloody hell. “There’s midly judging here.“ 

"You can’t judge me, you had a crush on Sirius”  

"I was young,” the voice of her mom echoed in Lily’s mind telling her that being young and in love means making mistakes. Marlene mistake was falling for a broken boy that was far gone for another guy. Lily’s mistake was finding Potter entacing. In comparission, Marlene’s one was the lesser of two evils. “Stop judging my life decisions and do something about yours or I’ll take the matter into my hands, and Merlin help you,” and wasn’t that a terrifying thought.

Lily sighed.

“Grief have five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance,” she looked over Marlene, who was now picking at her nails with her quill. 

“You better hurry into the last two before we get old,” she furrowed her nose, “I can pull old and foxy but I’m not sure you can pull red and wrinkles.”

“I can’t even begin to tell you how disgusting that is,” she started gathering the parchments and books to leave. If the last 30 minutes told her something, was that neither of them were going to finish their homework.

“Less than your undeniable feelings for Potter,” she fluttered her eyelashes and pouted her bottom lip in what should be an angelic expression but landed flat into diabolic. “I have tissues and we can get some chocolate for the cry party”

Lily squinted her eyes at her for a moment, just to look away a second later and gaze towards Potter again. His eyes weren’t on her now, immersed into whatever he was talking to Remus. But hers were on him. 

She took in sight every little quirk, from ruffling his hair to scratching his cheek. The way his mouth moved way too quickly to read his lips. The little scrapes on his arms that could be from quidditch or from retreating after a prank. How his shoulders tightened and slumped. Even the way he moved his hands around to emphasize. 

It felt like watching him for the first time since they met.  

And wasn’t that weird? She thought there wasn’t anything to see. A boy who was far gone into her. Who picked fights because he could and made pranks because he wanted to laugh. A boy who didn’t see consequences nor mistakes and she avoided like the plague. Now it was different.  _He was different_. Everything changed and she couldn’t stop looking at him.

Marlene cleared her throat. “Lily? Cry party on your honor?”

Lily nodded. “Count me in.”


End file.
